Rants and Ramblings: random commentary about culture, media, politics, technology and whatnot.

reunited

This whole fake Barbie/Ken “soap opera” just makes me angry and annoyed. First she dumps him for a surferboy, now she’s intrigued by his new makeover. Bleh.

After Mattel made headlines on Valentine’s Day 2004 by announcing the breakup of its beloved Barbie doll and her beau of 43 years, Ken Carson, Barbie is contemplating a reunion. She apparently has given her interim Aussie surfer lover boy, Blaine, the heave-ho and is intrigued by Ken’s new look.

“Ken had some time to think it all over and (decided) he needed a new look,” says Barbie spokeswoman Lauren Dougherty. “A makeover was inevitable.”

(USA Today: “Ken’s makeover gets Barbie’s attention” - 02/08/06)

In February 2004, as every 5-year-old knows, Ken and Barbie called it quits. According to Mattel, which says it relies on customer feedback on its Web site to shape the Barbie-Ken narrative, Barbie was wooed away by an Australian surfer named Blaine.

Ken, heartbroken, traveled the world in search of himself, making stops in Europe and the Middle East, dabbling in Buddhism and Catholicism, teaching himself to cook and slowly weaning himself off a beach bum life.

During the news conference this morning, timed to the opening of the American International Toy Fair in New York on Sunday, the new and improved Ken will emerge, restyled by a celebrity primper, Phillip Bloch, who has dressed Pierce Brosnan, Johnny Depp and Sean Combs.

Gone are Ken’s outdated swimming trunks and dull T-shirts. Ken’s new wardrobe will include cargo pants, a fitted suit with peak lapels and a motorcycle jacket. A facial resculpting, as Mattel calls it — Ken’s first in more than a decade — will give him a more defined nose and a softer mouth.

“It’s Matthew McConaughey meets Orlando Bloom,” Mr. Bloch said in an interview.

(New York Times: “A Makeover of a Romance” - 02/09/06)

Yeah. Like a consult with the Fab Five is enough to get a relationship on the rocks back on track. At the end of the day, despite his new look, he’s still steady, reliable Ken. And if that annoyed Barbie the first time around, it’s going to annoy her again eventually. Way to preach the superficial, Mattel. “Math is hard?” So are relationships. And with this trite marketing ploy, I feel like we’re following some stupid celebrity relationship drama, as told in the tabloids.

(Yes, I’m irrationally annoyed by this whole thing.)